Wednesday, May 5, 2010


So I pretty much stuffed my face today. I went out with the guys that I told you about earlier, ate a lot with them. Came home and realized that since I wasn't full I'm just going to have a peice of cake!

I do feel really empty though. Not in the food sense.

I just don't know what I want any more. And I feel that if I no longer want the things that I thought I did, then there is nothing to look forward to anymore.

I need something to look forward to, something with hope. Because without it I am empty.

I felt better when I was starving myself. I haven't been doing that in a long time since things have been so screwed up. Will things ever go back to the way it was? So that I can go back to being me.

1 comment:

  1. I do that some times. Gorging on food and coming home like who gives a fuck and eating everything else around me. I think that it's feeling that we lack control that adds to the emptiness. But your post made me think~ I'm going to make a list of (reasonable) things that I want to do and how I can get there as well as working on curbing the binging. Good luck dear <3